God is not a babysitter

WARNING: This may be disturbing to some readers. This article includes news of sexual brutality toward a child.

Monday evening I turned on the television in a hotel room in Gatlinburg, TN to hear something that made my blood boil… toward God. I was so disturbed by what I had heard that I found myself having difficulty sleeping. There were even moments when I wanted to scream out and cry for the misery that had been given to an innocent toddler who had no one to turn to… not even God.

You may have heard the news about someone who had videotaped the rape of a three-year-old girl. I have a three-year-old girl, a fact that caused this horrific news to hit so close to my heart that I have not been the same since the moment I turned on that television. I struggled with anger and frustration over my own helplessness. My mind was so troubled by this story that I woke up to the sound of a screaming girl crying “Mama!” in my sleep Monday night.

Because I am a visual person, it was difficult for me not to hear the screams, picture the begging, the crying, the helplessness that this baby must have experienced. And it made me so angry that I wanted to stand outside and scream, “Where are you, God?!!!!!”

I hear so many stories about God’s powerful presence during times of prayer, when entire cities are transformed by revival. Why is the powerful presence of God always so evident when people are worshiping, but not when an innocent child is being mutilated and destroyed by those who she believes are the protectors of her world?

The absence of God in these kinds of situations is beyond frustration for me and millions of others. I am so sorry for that little girl.

Although the questions that surround God’s absence in times of desperation may never be fully reconciled on this side of heaven, there is an answer.

God is not our babysitter.

Too often, we spiritualize our own responsibilities as protectors of the children in our communities and hand those responsibilities to God. In such a busy, out-of-control world, it is easy to forget that God gave us instructions to take care of our world and all that is in it. We cannot expect to raise our children in an irresponsible, hateful, brutal society and expect God to intervene every time we neglect our own jobs as stewards of the children in our world. And this is not a statement towards parents alone, but towards all adults. We all have a call to look out for the little ones, whether they are our own children or the children of others.

It is time that we stop pretending that God will bring down fire from heaven every time one of his children is in trouble. The simple truth is, we have a responsibility to be God’s eyes, ears, hands, and even fists in the world.

Keep our children safe. Stop trying to give God our jobs. God is not a babysitter!

Writer: Capt. Jonathan Gainey was born in Jacksonville, FL in June, 1969. He has been married to Staci, the daughter of retired Salvation Army officers, for twenty years and they have four children ages 18, 16, 12, and 4. Jonathan was commissioned as an officer in June of 2002, and is currently serving in his third appointment in New Bern, NC, USA. He is working on a Masters of Divinity from Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary and is the creator and manager of the Flocks Diner website, where his passion for learning and teaching is expressed and shared through writing and a weekly podcast.

13 Comments to God is not a babysitter

1. Jonathon

   You make a great point here about our own responsibility.
   Too many Christians ignore the world around them believing God will protect them and theirs as well as punish those who do such things you talk about. The truth is God expects us to be vigilant.

   Reading the newspaper and being current about news and the conditions of your home area are all part of our stewardship.

   J Stephenson
John Stephenson on March 31st, 2009

2. We have had similar cases occurring hear in the United Kingdom. It makes me feel so sick.

   The times in my officership so far when I’ve had to ‘be there’ in the midst of hell on earth for young people/childred are certainly times that have etched themselves on my psyche. I find myself becoming a father to so many in our fatherless society. Its difficult, its strenuous, but Lord help me to go.

   It was Jackie Pullinger who said that we must have hard feet and soft hearts. Hard feet to go where the promtings of God would have us go and soft hearts to hear the cries of the child in the night.

   May God grant us the will to do that but may the Lord also save us from soft feet and hard hearts!
Andrew Clark on March 31st, 2009

3. Jonathan, statistics show that there are millions of children that are sexually abused in your country. Statistics also show that there are many millions of Christians in your country as well. So it is quite reasonable to assume that there would be at least many thousands of children praying to your God to be freed from abuse, yet the abuse continues. Why would your God say no to these prayers, yet say yes to any of the trivial prayers ’sent up’? This type of thing has been one of the most powerful things leading me to conclude that God probably does not exist, and if He does then He is entirely non-interventionist. If He does exist and can intervene, chooses not to in situations of abuse, yet ’shows up’ in church, gets us that promotion at work and gets rid of our headache, then He is evil.
jack on March 31st, 2009

4. Hi Jonathan,

   Thankyou for your article - it resonates in me for different reasons. It also gives me hope for the church that people like you exist.

   But sad to say, Jack also has a point. Jack, from my perspective, I think the answer lies in our perception of God. I don’t believe God ‘gives us that promotion’, or ‘turns up in church’ as you say (this is prosperity doctrine which I despise). In many ways, I think you’re right - God is non-interventionalist. This is a very difficult question to wrestle with, and one that can not be answered in any ‘post’ on such a website. Indeed, it is even difficult to answer it in many books. But I would say God does intervene when we stand up and do something. We become ‘God’ in this world. We are His ‘angels’ or ‘exact messengers’ Or at least that is what we should be. Sadly, I believe the majority of ‘Christians’ aren’t, which is why we have a distorted view of God. They will be held responsible on the day of Judgement I believe. My view of God (if it were fully known by the mojority of Christians) would probably end with them all stonning me for being a heretic. Even in the Salvation Army Training College (seminary) I was known as the ’sessional heretic’ and my views are so liberal now they make my college days seem like extreme fundamentalism! My point is, to be ‘God’ in this world (whatever that means and whoever ‘god’ is), is probably such a departure from the traditional perception of ‘God’ and ‘Christianity’ that it would almost destroy the church as we know it. Perhaps that’s what the church needs, and challenges like yours will (I hope) bring that about.

   As to your conclusion that God doesn’t exist…. Well, one of my training officers in College used to say ‘We pray to god as we perceive him, her or it’. In my last appointment before I left the ‘Army, we constantly said ‘now let us pray to the god of our understanding’. God is to you what God is to you - nothing more, nothing less. God is different to you to what God is to me or to Jonathan or to anyone else.

   Yours in Christ,
   Graeme.
Graeme Randall on March 31st, 2009

5. I would add to the question of “If God exists, then why does he not intervene?” that we have to remember that the battle is a spiritual one. As long as we see the horrifying realities of this world as simply physical, we limit our ability to wage an effective and wisely strategic plan against them.

   “Life is war. That’s not all it is. But it is always that. Our weakness in prayer is owing largely to our neglect of this truth. Prayer is primarily a wartime walkie-talkie for the mission of the church as it advances against the powers of darkness and unbelief. It is not surprising that prayer malfunctions when we try to make it a domestic intercom to call upstairs for more comforts in the den” (John Piper, Let the Nations Be Glad, page 45).

   I wrote an article on my website, http://www.flocksdiner.com, on March 8th called “Tools of War.” And in that article, I point out that prayer is a tool of war, as explained by John Piper.

   Paul, the apostle, warned the Ephesians church that we are fighting a spiritual war (6:10-18).

   In war there are casualties. Some are brought down by the enemy and a surprisingly large number are brought down by friendly fire. War is messy.

   People are hurt emotionally, spiritually, and physically in war. Entire families are negatively impacted by a soldier of their family who is destroyed by war. Many are killed in war, but, sometimes, the worst effects of war are not necessarily the deaths of troops, but the troops who live to tell of the horrors of war, and especially those who are mangled and survive.

   God is the President, and his army—his troops—are fighting on the battlefields of this planet. And if we don’t recognize the true nature of the enemy’s tactics and strategies, we will be left unprepared to fight, thereby taking on an even larger number of casualties.

   The thing that boggles most minds is the fact that Christians not only have to be Christ in the world, we have to fight a war that many say does not even exist. There is no degrader of morale like being laughed at, scoffed, and ridiculed in the middle of a fight. This is a tough, spiritual war. And until more people are willing to recognize the true tactics and join the fight despite the ridicule, the number of casualties will continue to climb.

   As John Piper also says, “We cannot know what prayer is for, until we know that life is war.”

   Blessings,
   Johnny
Johnny Gainey on April 1st, 2009

6. Graeme. Sorry, mate, but…

   What a load of rubbish. God is One. He is the same to you as He is to me. Our perception of Him doesn’t change Who He is. And the problem with the world lies not in God’s neglect but in man’s rebellion.

   Until we fully accept both our own fallenness and His perfection, we’ll never have a framework from which to even being to understand the implications of His fullness becoming flesh in Jesus Christ, walking among “broken shards” if you will. That He does NOT abandon us all is a sign of His unmatched patience…

   Jack, I’m not going to water it down for you - God is infinite. His ways are above mine. yours. anyone’s.

   It would be so easy to give you a cliche answer like, “Oh, God expects us to be His hands and His feet,” but the truth is that there are no easy answers on questions like this. The only logical explanation of anything good happening in the world is that He is a good God. The flip-side is that the only logical explanation of the crap that goes on is that man has a heart bent toward evil - and the only thing that can turn that heart around is a love that took the penalty of His creation’s rebellion upon Himself.

   But that starts with confessing that the problem with this world is not pedophiles or murderers… the problem with the world is me.
Jeremiah on April 1st, 2009

7. YIKES. I must have been in a bad mood when I wrote those first two sentences. I’m sorry, Graeme. That wasn’t very Christlike of me. Please forgive me. I stand by what I wrote in the rest of my comment. Wish I could take back those lines. One more example of our fallenness, I guess.
Jeremiah on April 1st, 2009

8. Free-will.

   I have had the question posed to me so often - “Why does God allow bad stuff to happen to good people?” - and so often I didn’t have the answer. Well, I still don’t have the answer, but I do have a better understanding, because I understand this fairly simple truth:

   God gave us free-will. He wants us to be able to choose Him - to have the ‘want to’ to be in relationship with Him. If He decided to change every bad thing that happened in this world, He would be taking the decision-making ability that He gave to each one of us away - hence also taking away the ability to choose Him.

   So, why did that have to happen to an innocent one (I have a 4 year old daughter - I can’t even imagine) ? Only God knows. He could have sent someone at just the right time to stop that from happening. He could have struck that man with a heart attack and stopped him from performing that truly evil act. Who knows why evil things have to happen… oh wait - I keep hearing the line “totally depraved and as such are justly exposed to the wrath of God” Hmm… perhaps he will get what is due to him?

   Or wait - what happens if this person asks for forgiveness?

   Wow. Now you have me thinking…
Melissa on April 1st, 2009

9. Hey Melissa,

   There is an ancient, Jewish teaching called “Tsimtsum” (pronounced tseem-tsoom) which means separation. The article I wrote about this teaching, which I learned from a book by Athol Dickson called, The Gospel According to Moses, can be found here: http://flocksdiner.com/?p=83.

   Tsimtsum is a philosophy which aids in the understandings of “Free-Will” and “Why bad things happen, even though God is in charge.”

   And, again, I would also point to the fact that we are in a spiritual war where we are bound to experience casualties.

   In His dust,
   Johnny
Johnny Gainey on April 2nd, 2009

10. So Johnny (and everone else), do you believe God intervenes in this world or not? When Christians pray for a person suffering illness and that person is apparently healed, they are quick to proclaim it as answered prayer. If God has said yes to that prayer request, why has he said no in the type of case I posed previously? An earlier commenter is happy to go with the “God’s ways are above our ways” line, but that certainly is not an adequate explanation for me - is it for you?
Jack on April 2nd, 2009

11. Hey Jack. It’s not an adequate response for me. And here is why…I am a Westerner.

    Westerners want answers. We want 2 + 2 to equal 4, and we don’t want it to answer anything else. Even decimals and fractions take us a long time to grasp when we first begging to study them.

    But, to the Easterner, which is part of the reason, I believe, God chose the Jews, are a people who are not so pragmatically stuck.

    One example is given of two Western people who are comparing answered prayers. One says, “My child was sick and I prayed for her, and she was healed. God is amazing.” The other said, “My child was sick, and I prayed, but she died. God isn’t fair.”

    Two Eastern fathers were telling of the same situation…one child was healed and the other died after both fathers prayed. The response from those men was, “Isn’t God a mystery?”

    We want to judge God, because we don’t understand why he doesn’t work fairly. But we’re really no different with our own parents. When one child gets something that another doesn’t, we cry, “Mommy loves you more than me!” And we insist that our parent give us an answer to this obvious unfairness. But just like mom and dad, God doesn’t have to give us a reason for his favor upon one and apparent lack of caring for the other.

    Not only that, but there is also a great teaching about two daughters of a king. One is a demanding brat and the other is as sweet as homey. In this ancient rabbinical story, the father-king gives the brat whatever she asks for right away. To the sweet daughter, he delays because he loves to spend time with her.

    That’s a very simple understanding of why God may not answer one’s prayers while giving another what they want. But it also points to the fact that an apparent blessing, may not be a blessing, while an apparent neglect may be a blessing indeed.

    Isn’t God a mystery?

    Many blessings,
    Johnny
Johnny Gainey on April 2nd, 2009

12. Jack, I meant to say “Even decimals and fractions take us a long time to grasp when we first “begin” to study them.

    You get the point, I’m sure.
Johnny Gainey on April 2nd, 2009

13. Overall much is a mystery because God is God and we are not.
    To see how much God cares we have to look to Jesus our Savior and His sacrifice which He chose and agreed to provide. Yes, provision was made for those that do not deserve it. That is everyone. Evil lurks in the world because of a fallen race and times are getting worse. Answers to prayer vary according to God’s will. Do we understand all of that ? No! Free-will does create a problem.We do not always make the proper choices and sometimes that poses a huge problem for us and others around us. That is the way sin is. It affects us all. Thank God there will be a judgement day and He is loving , fair and knows all the circumstances. I have seen many things “unfair” in life but I believe that in the end God will work it all out. It is the here and now that we have to deal with and much patience is needed until that “Day”.
    The world as a whole will not get any better. The Bible declares that. In fact the saints will cry in heaven and earth “How long oh Lord , how long”? God will answer and remove every tear, but until then I have joy in my heart that I have eternal life but I have responsibilites to God and my fellow man. Perhaps we need to work harder at relieving the suffering of humanity. Oh, and pray harder too. God is listening. We all must continue to study the Word so that it’s instruction and wisdom will be evident and helpful in times of need. All of this smothered in God’s grace is all that we have until we see Him face to face.
Robert Deidrick on August 19th, 2009

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