From Russia with blogs | lonely

… lonely in the crowd | Vadim Hurin

Today there seem to be many more lonely people that there were 20-30 years ago. I remember that in my childhood I lived at my grandmother’s house out in a remote village. There many knew me and I knew many. It was possible to simply go outside and meet someone that I knew. This was especially fitting when there was an emergency. There was always someone I could refer to for help. Joyful moments in life, holidays also gathered many people. What was most pleasant about such occasions is that we all knew each other well.

Then I moved into the city. There I no longer knew as many people. But still I knew quite a few in my apartment complex. I could easily knock on someone’s door to ask for a Russian blog1missing grocery item or for a glass of water.

But times change. Today I live in a big city and I do not know any of my neighbours with the exception of one. He comes to borrow money when he is drunk, usually on a weekend. Even though I greet people when I meet them on a stairway, they do not know my name and I do not know theirs. Somehow it feels uncomfortable.

In my friends list on an internet site I have over 100 friends. But all of them are out there - in the world of internet. I can write something to them and receive an answer, but very often they are too busy to come in for a cup of tea or to meet at a certain place. Loneliness prevails in the end.

In a corps the situation is not much different. There is a small circle of friends where people know each other. But their conversations rarely exceed the familiar ground of the common “How are you?” question. Then come some prayer needs, which do not really touch upon serious life struggles. The rest of the congregations are faithful attendees. They just come and go. We are happy to see them, but very few want us to know their names, let alone to engage their lives and well-being. These attendees realize such a reality quickly and abstain from providing detailed accounts about themselves. They quickly learn the rules of conduct and proper answers.

Although, I have to note, there is a group of people who want to get closer to one another. They pray for one another consistently. They meet not only on Sundays, but also begin to participate in one another’s lives. But this fire quickly fades under the pressure of problems or sins. And then, once again, it becomes “all quiet on the Western Front.” Lonely people, trapped by their sins, fears and problems attempt to solidify their relationships with God by using “new” methods and spiritual disciplines.

Too often, unfortunately, this becomes another barrier which they use to separate themselves from others. But this cannot be. Perhaps you have experience with penetrating the thick of loneliness. Your experience can aid someone. Please write, do not hesitate!

Writer: Captain Vadim Khurin was born into a family of circus artists. He joined The Salvation Army in 1995 and is now an officer serving in St. Petersburg, Russia. He loves music, sports, reading and learning. He has a beautiful wife - Inna - and three children. He likes to ask hard questions and find different ways of helping people get back their wholeness and integrity.

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